Let Your Love Shine Through
By: Bay, 6th Grade
I thought it was impossible. I thought you would never be found; that you would never return. I hold my head in my hands, feeling the tears pushing at the back of my tightly closed eyelids. No, I tell myself. No, I would not cry. People aren’t supposed to cry unless it was absolutely necessary. It just wouldn’t seem right if I cried right now. But this is necessary, I tell myself. A few drops begin to slide down my cheeks, and I feel my stomach clench in pain.
I just don’t understand. Why did you leave? There was no reason for it; at least I thought so. Maybe there was something you hadn’t told me. But that seemed impossible. We swore once that we would tell each other everything that happened, good, bad, embarrassing or anything. But maybe you had been hiding something from me. But wouldn’t that go against our promise?
I could easily envision you breaking the rules, but for some reason never breaking a promise. I knew that they were rarely made by you, but promises just seemed something too precious to even be rebelled against by the hardiest of souls. Could it have simply been a spur of the moment sort of deal? But who would run away from their life, their house, and their friends; only because of a single impulsive thought? Not you, I would think. Or would you? Maybe I don’t know you as well as I think I do. The thought scares me.
Is there another side of you I’ve never seen? I’d always thought I knew practically everything about you. I guess I was wrong. But I’m not sure I would like this other side of you. I like you just the way you are. But would the normal you run away like this?
Will you come back? Will one side of you decide that you need to return to your normal life? I’m worried… what if you decide to never come back? What about me, what about all your other friends? I don’t think the you I know would abandon everything like that. Or would you? I feel as though I don’t know you anymore.
What if you never were the person you said you were? I think this is simply turning from normal worry into paranoia. Is it that I care too much for your safety? Have I ever considered my well-being is more important that anyone else’s? Am I just too nice? But is that a bad thing? I wish you were here to answer all these questions. You are smarter than me, after all. But wouldn’t you know the consequences of leaving like this? I do. Maybe we just learn at different paces.
My fists clench and unclench in anger. I look up, my face now blatantly stained with tears. I will find you. I will search until I find you, and when I do find you, I’ll scream at you until my throat burns with every breath. You idiot… how could you be so moronic? I look outside the window, the sunset’s glare hitting me squarely in the eyes and making me squint. The colorful mixture of oranges, yellows, pinks, reds, and the various blues and purples of the sky form a beautiful rainbow of color, causing the land to become awash in the mystical glow that can only be created by the ever-constant twilight of the countryside. The light makes me happy, and makes me feel warm inside. It reminds me of you for some reason. The sun’s fiery power reminds me of your explosive personality, and the thought of your familiar face makes me smile. As I turn away from the window and head out the door, my smile remains. I will find you, and everything is going to be alright.